Pride will suffocate your marriage
When Pride Breaks, Healing Begins
They sat on opposite ends of our couch. Silent. Exhausted. Neither one knowing how to bridge the gap that had slowly — and then suddenly — opened between them.
This couple (let’s call them Mark and Sarah) had once been best friends. They laughed easily, dreamed together, prayed together, but over time, the everyday stresses, the unspoken expectations, and the subtle resentments began to build. Small arguments turned into full-blown fights. Words that once brought life now cut deep.
Mark blamed Sarah for being critical. Sarah blamed Mark for checking out. Both felt unheard. Both felt unseen. Both were convinced that if the other person would just change, things would get better.
That’s when they finally sought help. Not because they wanted to, but because they couldn’t imagine another year of living like roommates at war.
The Turning Point
Sitting across from them, I (Javier) leaned in gently and asked, “What would it look like for you to lay down your pride? To take ownership, not for everything, but for your part?”
That was the moment the walls began to crack.
Sarah admitted the bitterness she had been nursing. Mark confessed the ways he had withdrawn instead of engaging. Neither of them liked going first, but once the words were spoken, something shifted in the room. For the first time in years, they weren’t enemies anymore — they were allies again, fighting the real battle: pride and sin.
The Power of Ownership
Healing didn’t come overnight, but with each small act of humility — each apology, each confession, each intentional choice to forgive — their marriage began to breathe again.
They realized restoration didn’t require perfection. It required surrender. It required saying, “I was wrong.” It required letting God do what only He can do when we stop trying to win and start choosing to love.
The Story Behind Every Story
Mark and Sarah’s story is really all of our story, isn’t it? Marriage isn’t destroyed by one big blow most of the time. It’s slowly eroded by pride, blame, and unrepented sin. The good news is restoration is always possible.
When pride is laid down, healing begins. When ownership is taken, forgiveness flows. When two people stop fighting against each other and start fighting for each other, miracles happen.
God’s heart for marriage has always been restoration, redemption, and reconciliation. He is still in the business of making broken things beautiful.
